I have written about these feelings before and more specifically why do you come here? However, over the last couple of days, I have been having those moments of self-doubt, who is reading when I am writing, am I growing as a blogger/writer and likewise.
The blogosphere is full of talented folks from across generations, those who have made a name for themselves, those who have been published, awarded, and interviewed, and here I am. A nobody even after three plus years of this blog’s existence.
I like to write so not that I will stop writing but maybe I need to do something different that helps me gain more confidence in writing.
I am looking at reading some books on creative writing and practicing techniques so that I can hone skills. I am also planning to reach out to other bloggers for some feedback. I am looking for genuine suggestions on how to improve and be better.
Would you like to share some more ideas with me to help me get over this feeling of self-doubt?
Writing for #MicroblogMondays today and this picture of my laptop has been tagged to Mundane Monday #62
happiness and food 
You write because you want to write. Many read, but don’t necessarily react/write back on every post. and Parul, you should write because you write so well. I think it’s creative, like creating music, or a painting. Do write. We will read.
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Come on, Parul. Everyone goes through this phase – yes, even the so-called more established ones. Do you know why? Because it only happens :
1. You are ready to grow as a writer, blogger ….an artist of sorts
2. You know you are forever going to evolve as one of those people that I mentioned in point one.
3. You want to get better – and that your writing is slowly going past the ‘writing just for fun’ phase. Yes, writing for fun and yourself is inherently good; but the fact that you’re now looking at readers and what they want, and why they keep coming to your blog is a very introspective stage and it just shows your readiness.
And finally, the confidence you need to write and continue to write will have to come from within and perhaps from a close circle of honest friends/critiques rather than books. Books are a good tool – but eventually, you write in your own voice; and your readers will know that better than a bestseller book.
Good luck!
PS: Just my thoughts – feel free to throw them in the trash; i do that sometimes with my own thoughts 🙂
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One advice I think I can give is to avoid looking at your stats: the comments, the views, the likes, nothing. Focus on getting more audience for your posts, thereby adding more and more people to your existing fan base.
Or maybe you could take up a challenge? Or start your own challenge? A little innovation, a different category that you want to try your hand at, just try anything new.
And if this helps: Your AtoZChallenge posts were certainly not the work of someone who’s not confident about their writing prowess!
Stay strong, and know that it’s just the dark night before the bright morn 😃
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I think you are underestimating yourself. Your writing comes across as being authentic – that’s just the way I like it. I’ve been blogging for almost 9 years and though I’ve toyed with the idea of publishing, I haven’t done it either. I enjoy blogging and interacting and feel I have nothing to prove. I’m sure you don’t need that either.
Have said this, it’s always good to grow and hone your skills. There are plenty of writing courses and coaches online that you could pursue, if you like.
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Parul, I know these feelings too well. We all have such phases I guess, of self doubt. That is when we reflect and learn and grow.
But let me tell you this. I love your writings. Especially all your women topics. You write the truth and you write them from the heart.
Just write for the love of writing. That is what I have learnt and that alone will take you forward.
I am currently reading Austin Klein’s newsletters and also bought his journal! It is fantastic to get your creative mind churning. You can alsobtru few writing courses from coursera. I had done one a while back.
And just ping if you want to talk or discuss anything! 🙂
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Hey Parul!
I apologize for feeling glad that I have company.
All the people here have commented so wisely, so I have nothing new to say. The harshness of this universe is that you will have to find your own answers, we can only help you ask better questions. I am sure you must have asked yourself these, but do you know ‘Why are you writing in the first place? What do you want to do with your blog? Touch readers? Empower women? Influence and Inspire people? Record your personal journey? Tell your story?’
Once you have figured that out, one other thing that helps is, find a writer who touches you like no other. Find what is in his/her writing that moved you. What is it that awed you and made you go back to her blog.
And readers always want more. Variety. So we always have to innovate. Get creative. Read more. Hone our skills. Expand audience. And more importantly, write from the heart.
I am nowhere close to where you are today Parul. I keep coming back to your blog because it offers me so many different categories. Women at work, Gratitude lists, thoughts, food. I hope you find your answers. I hope you go places. We know all the answers, but sometimes we just need to hear it from somebody else. So please forgive me if I said what you already knew 🙂
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Sorry one last thing.
Enjoy what you do. The minute the joy of writing is overtaken by the pressure to be liked, words stop coming from the heart.
And another last thing( so sorry! I just cant stop myself!) , I read somewhere on Quora, that the difference between Good and Great is just 5%. Give 5% more to you next post and see what happens!
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Parul, though pretty new just 3 weeks in this world and I know how it feels..is there somebody really reading all those things we write and click.. I did worry about it for couple of days and later realised, it’s my journal open for the world, people might come in if they find interesting stuff or no..but that should not stop me from posting quality content, cos those who love my stuff will come back..
You are doing great, publishing 4-5 blogs a week with full time job is not an easy thing..shows your commitment and hard work..
The best things your blog has: Commitment, authentic, they address the social gender issues we have been facing, your gratitude list all the topics you use sums up the person who you are and even for a stranger it’s east to define you, as you have created that identity with the topics you have chosen..
If I may have to say, what else I would like to see more, may be more pictures around the content (that’s something a food blogger looks for 😉 will blame my passion for photos) and some humor.. I read many personal blogs and I most often see this part missing..
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I agree with the comments about writing for yourself and writing because you love it. Knowing what you want to accomplish can also help. If your goal is to regularly practice writing, you’re doing that! Your blog is meeting your goal, regardless of what anyone thinks.
PS I really like Emily Dickinson’s poem “Nobody.” Have you read it? http://www.online-literature.com/dickinson/448/
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It is good to introspect. It is good to feel self-doubt because it makes you get better. Reading more on writing and practicing hones your writing further. I think you are doing a credible job with the blog considering you have a full-time job. Spend some more time in charting out your writing goals and work towards them. Good luck!
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Parul, after reading the comments below, I feel all of us go through self-doubts. You write well. But, always good to learn more about writing. Keep doing what you are doing now. From your posts, I feel you love to write about women. That could be an area of strength for you.
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I consider myself still a novice despite being into blogging for a year, and so I may be of no help in advices. But if it helps, you should know that there are people like me who look up to bloggers like you to learn from. 🙂 That is proof in itself that you’re doing great. Keep going!
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Even the most famous and accomplished writers have had their moments of doubt. One of the greatest Presidents of the United States, Abraham Lincoln, was prone to self doubt. Many times, success is not overnight. Or, if you look at “overnight” success closely, you find that it comes after years of hard work invisible to the observer. Hang in there!
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You in self-doubt! Can’t believe it, Parul. Your posts are unique and valuable, all of them. I mean it. Of course, writing courses are good but you are already good. Trying to learn new skills is always good. You know, long back, even before I started to blog, when my husband used to tell me to write regularly, I was hesitant because of this self-doubt. Those days my concern, so what I managed to write a poem, that was just by luck. I never thought I had it in me whatever it took to write and present before others. Not that I don’t have doubts now. Why do you think I’m not blogging now! Keep writing, Parul. No doubts needed. You will be read, always!
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Parul, we all have different reasons for why we write. And also, what we want writing to mean to us. It seems you are having doubts because you have a certain image of a successful blogger in mind. But then success doesn’t have a single definition, it means different thing to different people. For some it is about making money from blogging, for some it is getting hundreds of comments and likes, for some it is getting published, for some it could be something entirely different. For some it may not be success at all, but something else that gives them joy. I think as you go through those writing books and reflect on your writing practice, you will discover more about ‘that’ which makes blogging/writing a joyful experience for you. A process like this generally helps one get over these feelings of self-doubt, which all of us go through from time to time, in different ways.
Personally speaking, early on in my blogging (and I am still a newbie like you – three years) I had decided what I didn’t want my writing and my blog to become. Which meant that I would stick to my vision for my blog and my reason for writing, even if that meant having just a handful of readers. (Or hardly any readers, if you consider my work on Matriwords!) Like I said, we all have different reasons for why we write 🙂 I am sure you will discover yours as you go through the introspective phase you find yourselves in.
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Hi Parul,
I, myself have been blogging for quite a while without any great achievement but never ever did any doubt come to my mind. Yes, the stats sometimes did make me mad but truly, you’ll get over these. You write for yourself, not for people. Keep doing what you do and soon people will see your uniqueness and the response will start to look good. Trust me, it’all happen and it is happening! Now abandon this self-doubt, grab a bite of your favourite food and write your heart out! 😄
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I found your blog by reading a pleasant comment of yours in Hugh’s blog (Hugh’s Views and News) and this is primarily the way I find blogs – by visiting people whose comments I find pleasant, intriguing and/or interesting.
I’ve been blogging (not just here) for over a decade and and this is one of the best ways to find other blogs and bloggers.
All bloggers – particularly those who have feeling and empathy – worry from time to time about the same things: is anyone reading their blog, why are they reading, etc. There are a lot of things you can do to increase readership but the best thing is to find blogs you truly enjoy, comment in them regularly with thoughtful content and read other people’s comments there. It’s a community: you have to put quite a lot of effort into finding people and then follow up on the ones who find you. It takes a lot of reading, a lot of commenting, and that will eat time out of anything else you want or need to do, but if a bigger readership is what you want, that’s what you have to do. You should also reply to all or as many comments in your own blog, as you can, as that is what helps build the community. And if you allow threaded comments you’ll find that interesting discussions start (you can still keep moderation turned on).
As for stats – ignore them if you can. A lot of people read blogs in other ways, for instance via RSS feeds, and they won’t show up in stats. (Though if you use a feed reader the site itself often has stats of its own for the subscribed blogs).
I’ve not read much of your blog yet but, so far, I like what I see.
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Hey Parul! You must be having a bad day. Ok if it makes you feel good, I have been blogging for 8 years now, participated in 2 A to Z challenges, attend blogger meets with people younger than my daughters, visit other bloggers’ sites ( who don’t bother to reciprocate) , have wasted money re vamping my blog, make meaningful comments, post regularly, faithfully follow tips by Darren Rowse, Jon Morrow , Tanya @Blogelina, and still don’t have a 100 followers.
I should have given up blogging years ago because my family finds it intrusive and non productive.
BUT I still blog !
So stop feeling sorry for yourself.
You have a great blog going. You are doing everything right and you have hundreds of followers .
Your content is great, your photos fantastic and you have an engaging style .
So what more do you want?
Keep writing girl! Remember you write for yourself ….
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I totally agree with Bellybytes. I have been doing this for years and do not have loads of followers. Here is another reason to keep up the blogging because it will become a legacy for future family members. Oh how I wish I had diaries from my ancestors. Documenting your thought and life events will there as long it sits on the Internet and even in some Archive sites into the future.
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I was actually in a fix whether to offer my words or not for my thoughts would not be grave different from all the above responses posted by wonderful people here. Did you notice one thing…just to absolve your apprehension, so many nicer souls have come out of their shell just to tell you that you and your words do connect; and that’s what (perhaps) matters the most. The best part in your words remains – the simplicity and honesty. Some moments of self-introspection do, in a way, serve as a catalyst to help us churn out better posts but don’t let these place a shadow of your truer self (see for that matter my blog, you won’t find much comments on many of my posts. Feels bad but sometimes you just have to do what you want to..)
So Cheer up and just have a re-look at above comments whenever you are in a fix…it will surely give you that much-needed nudge. You have a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge following for sure and I am one of them. Stay blessed and keep writing 🙂
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I keep feeling the same from time to time.. I have some plans but off late I’m just not getting time to implement them..on top of that when I see others doing so well and articulating their views so clearly, I feel so inadequate..anyways, about you, my dear, you have a clear voice which touches your readers.. These self doubt induced phase will only make you better..that’s all I can say 🙂 it just shows you care so much..
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A common thought… and growth as a blogger may often seem slow.But my advice is have patience. Sometimes I get these thoughts too . The blogging space is crowded how does one grow? Or what exactly is growth in the first place? And who defines them? I slowly realised the answer lies with me. And tips…one has to think out of the box sometimes …😉.. I am still trying to get that out of the box thought…..
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Parul , am an absolute no body so here’s my view from someone really down the ladder ..
I feel one is critical of oneself when one has high standards.. so as a blogger perhaps the way you can get out of the self doubt phase [ which are natural for any one at any level across any sphere of life , including blogging]
is by setting goals and benchmarking your progress against that.
for whatever its worth — you did seek advice right 🙂
now come out of the phase and go write a post about how advice comes easy from nobodies in the blogosphere 😉
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I don’t know if there is a simple answer for why people read or how to improve a blog. It feels like it is all about writing what is meaningful to you, and hopefully people connect with those words.
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Okay, if you’re having self-doubts, what hope is there for the rest of us? 😉
In all seriousness, I visit your blog because I enjoy your voice, and the topics you choose to write about. I’m also envious of the number of comments you get on each blog – for example, this one will have 25 once I hit the “post comment” button – I don’t think I’ve gotten that many comments in a week, let alone one post!
If you’re feeling in a rut, maybe Google some writing prompts or challenges (I’ve seen a few 30-day writing challenges that look interesting). But please be reassured that in the Blogosphere, you are definitely not a nobody!
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Write for your self and only for yourself. It is true that we all want that appreciation. Appreciation will come unexpectedly, all you need to do is keep doing what you love to do. Do I sound wise?! 😛
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Having regularly read your posts for quite a while, I can’t believe how you would go through self doubt ;).
On a serious note, I vouch for the fact that you are truly growing as a blogger and this is seeing you grow to write on a various spectrum of topics and also attract a huge number of readers from across the world and different walks of life.
And I must say that bloggers like you are an inspiration for me. Though I may have started blogging more than half a decade ago, your posts and style of writing have struck a chord with me :).
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