Over the last month or so, some thoughts have been lingering on my mind. And no, these are not just random thoughts. Some conversations made me think a lot more than I usually do. I thought about myself. More than ever.
We all have a sense of what kind of individuals we are. We behave according to that notion of ourselves. Our actions at all places are based on these beliefs that we hold about ourselves. In a variety of situations, we stick to these thoughts. For bloggers, what we write on our blogs is also a representation of our personality. Words, actions, thoughts and sometimes, body language are mostly coherent for each one of us.
How would you feel if someone tells you that you are not who you think you are? Would you be disturbed? Would you be forced to think that something is not right? How would you fix this or would you try to fix?
I know these are a lot of questions and I am figuring these out but there are a couple of things I know for sure.
- If my sense of values is not compromised by my actions, I am doing things right.
- My actions cannot please everyone so I should not worry a lot.
- If I am not manipulating my actions to my benefit, I am not doing anything wrong.
- When I am not doing anything wrong, why should I worry?
If the universe is bringing to me what am I am grateful for, it is a practice I have developed. If this is working for me, it is my success.
Are you confused? Don’t be.
This is not a rant but something that has been on my mind and I would love to know your thoughts.
Some food for thought on Day 2 of #NaBloPoMo.
happiness and food 
This is something I have actually wondered about. If someone tells me I am not what I think I am my first reaction would be disbelief and, if I don’t like that person, I’d probably reject the thought outright. If I do value that person the statement would make me introspect.. a lot. I believe very few of us truly know ourselves. We keep passing judgements at other people saying ‘I would have never done that’ or ‘I wouldn’t react that way’ but the truth is we don’t really know what we would do or how we would react in a situation we’ve never been in. Unless of course we have given it deep honest thought. Thought provoking post Parul.
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Thank you Tulika. I also told myself the same. I thought about the feelings I had and what confused me but I feel I know who I’m at the core. At least I think so 🙂
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My first reaction, of course I would be upset. That thought wouldn’t leave my mind for days. But then as you said, if I am not doing anything wrong, why worry unnecessarily. It is only another individual’s perception about me.
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True. Exactly what I told myself. Thanks Shalini.
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Sometimes I may feel hurting. In that case, I should question myself to know better. “Who am I” is an unanswered question for me at present. But am sure I will find the answer sooner than never.
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You will find it Vasantha.
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Food for thought indeed! And I think, as women, we often have our identity questioned. I often find myself wondering if I am doing right as a wife/daughter or should I just be the person I am. I don’t know if this makes sense in the context of your post – but it does take a while to figure out who we really are. And once we do, it doesn’t matter what people think we are. I was more confused and influenced by what people told me about who I was in my 20s. But I think being in 30’s brings a new sense of self-confidence and awareness and now, I don’t care who people think I Am. all the best for the rest of your challenge!
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I know what you mean. For now I know I care about what people think of me but I don’t obsess over it. I’m trying to achieve that balance.
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I dred that moment .. and I try to be me all the time but situations arise , I dont think we can all be US all the time ..
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You are right!
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I believe your last line summed it up pretty well. You need to be happy doing things you believe are right. You can never be everyone’s cup of tea, remember? 😉
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True that, Shailaja!
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Aah! Such words from someone we value would hurt a lot. And that would make me introspect too. But if I believe, that I am doing things right, I wouldnt worry much. Also, everybody’s perspective is different and you cant please everyone. So smile and forgive them!
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Forgiving is making peace with it. You are right, Shilpa. Thanks for the advise.
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This post has made me think, Parul. It really has.
I loved reading it, as I do all your posts.
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Thank you, Mayuri. Appreciate your lovely words.
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if someone says so , let him or her say so because its his or her thinking , though these talks disturb but we should shed it off like dust . if you are doing right , don”t worry — do accordingly. in fact people dont say , their comlex and insecurity speak .
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Thanks for your words.
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That’s a wonderful line if thought Parul.
Though my take is, I do not allow everyone’s opinion of me, of my work affect me. Though every opinion matters but what we soak up is the crucial bit. This us why being at peace with ourselves & our choices empowers us enough to know what to care for & what to let go.
Happy to connect with you again (after a long hiatus) for NaBloPoMo. These writing challenges are very wonderful that way 🙂
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You said it so well. Thank you!
Yes, these challenges are so good to connect with each other.
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Thought provoking for sure . Why do I care about what is being said by others and who we are? I am because I am. Thanks for raising this
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