It’s a quiet morning. The weather is very unlike Bangalore. I cannot see the Sun outside and it’s windy. At 9 AM, it feels like 7 AM.
I am standing in my balcony and I see people have their sweatshirts on. Bike riders have covered themselves as if it’s snowing. Truth be told, we are not used to the dip in temperatures like this. The monsoons bade us goodbye long ago. Branches of this big tree are swaying with the wind. The birds seem scared to perch themselves and the squirrels are nowhere to be seen.
From the bedroom, I hear a light hum. Looks like VT dozed off. His snores are filling in the quiet around. I wonder if it’s just me who thinks so much about days, months and years that are flying by. Do these thoughts come because it is a quiet morning?
Can you believe we are a month away from closing the chapter of 2019 from our books?
This year has been a mixed bag for me. When things went south, something good happened and balanced it. 2019 started on a sombre note when my sister-in-law had to be on life support. It was a scary time for us as a family. After fighting for two months, she recovered. Likewise for every celebration or happy moment, there was something that went wrong. We traveled to my in-laws’ to celebrate Diwali and a day after the festival, my father-in-law got sick and had to be admitted.
Some days, it felt as if there was a quiet before an oncoming storm and then when the dark clouds came, there was a silver lining. Life to me is drifting with the flow and pulling back in a measured way so the net gain is moving forward.
As a kid, I couldn’t wait to be an adult. I wanted to take my own decisions. Now I want to go back to being a kid again. I want to let my parents decide what should be in the fridge for tomorrow and what’s on the table today. Why does the responsibility keep shifting from one shoulder to the other as we age? I did not know this was the deal to grow up.
There is a street hawker selling some leafy vegetables in my neighborhood. He has a full stock and women are coming out of their houses to buy. They are bargaining over a bundle of coriander. The morning albeit late, has picked up pace. People are out with their dogs for a walk. Kids are setting up wickets for a game of gully cricket. In the bedroom, VT is up and busy on his phone.
I don’t need to look at my watch. It’s time for me to get rolling too. I am heading out for lunch with my friends and it will be good to meet them before 2020 begins. It was a quiet morning but not anymore. There is no wind now but the Sun is still under wraps. Unlike Bangalore in November.
Writing a non-fiction piece today for YeahWrite #451.
happiness and food 
Your morning sounds like mine, Parul. The temperature dropped to 11 degrees here. December and winter are finally upon us.
And when you speak about the mixed bag your year has been, I so hear you. It’s been the same at my end too. This takes me back to the Khalil Gibran poem on Joy and Sorrow that I recently blogged on. Sharing a few lines for you:
“Some of you say, “Joy is greater thar sorrow,” and others say, “Nay, sorrow is the greater.”
But I say unto you, they are inseparable.
Together they come, and when one sits, alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.”
Pained to hear about your Sil, but at the same time I’m glad to know that she is better and on the mend. Praying for your father-in-law to be in the best of his health. And for your Sil to be healed and healthy too.
Take care Parul, and I do hope you had a lovely lunch.
Happy new week!
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I can relate to your thoughts so very well, Parul. There was a time when I so looked forward to growing up, just like you and now, I wish I wasn’t a grown up, what with having to take so many critical decisions every now and then. Reminds me of the lines—”Man forever is fraught. Always wanting what is not.”
Very sorry to hear of your sister-in-law and Father-in-law, Parul. What a relief to know she has now recovered. Hope father-in-law is also on the mend. You know, we’ve faced these health scares so many times during this year, and all I can say is I totally understand your situation. Challenges come and go, Parul. I hope and pray that we always have enough strength and wisdom to sail through them and grow wiser.
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Life is made up of these ups and downs. I think the trick is learning to accept that, as you have done. You both have had a tough time with loved ones being ill, but through it all you’ve managed to stay afloat and even enjoy your travels! More power to both of you.
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It is a boon that life some how always manages to balance out. Just like accounting sheets, life too has a way of keeping track of the good and the bad. The silver lining is always there, we just need to learn to look for them in the most unlikely places at times. The year 2019 has been a mixed bag of emotions for me too. But with time, I have learnt to accept the good and bad times as just passing phases in life..
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I get what you say, Parul about the crazy weather here in Bangalore.
And I really hope that your sister-in-law & father-in-law are feeling better now. I can totally understand what kind of turmoil these health upsets can stir in family.
Well, adulting is so beautiful but difficult. There are times when I also think the same way; the way Mom used to keep me absolutely worry-free about whatever was up at home before I got married. Leading your own independent life is so cool; but there come a lot of ‘occasional’ empty feelings when you wonder if you could still be pampered like a child.
You’re doing good, buddy!
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When it comes to mood swings I’d compare it to Bangalore weather. Such difference it makes in a day.
It was like seeing you from the adjacent apartment Parul. An uninterrupted thought process. Mornings like these are calming and slow. That’s the beautiful thing about it. Happy v weekend
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Lovely, contemplative post. Would we even know real joy if we never experienced its opposite? Would we be willing never to experience it, if the trade-off was a dull sense of contentment, always?
I would love to see a photo of these kids playing “gully cricket.” I wonder if it would match the image conjured in my head, and think probably not quite. We have “street ball” and “gullywashers” and no one here sets up wickets unless playing crochet (I’m sure they do, on the cricket field; I don’t know much about the game, to be honest). I wonder what I write that needs better illustration for an international audience. 🙂
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Oh that’s an awful scare! Hope your father in law and sister in law are feeling better now. Adulting is hard. All that responsibility, all that expectation that as an adult we are supposed to be put together! But these ups and downs make us appreciate life. Appreciate the people in our life who love us no matter what.
I wish your family well. Take care.
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