happiness and food

Does that even sound like a candy quiz question where hands will go up in the air and family members will shout “Me! Me!!”?? You are right! Not even an iota of doubt exists when this question is popped. Whose job is it? Mothers, wives, sisters, girl friends – a woman’s. No, I am not saying this. This is what most of us have seen in our households and even the LED/LCD/Plasma idiot box at home show us. When it comes to buying groceries, filling water, making tea, cleaning toilets,  sending Chintu to school, and soaking , washing and drying clothes, a woman steals the show. Our Bollywood movies have also won the race by romanticizing the topic by showing budding romance when the female lead asks the male lead to handover his shirt so that she can wash and remove that little stain, and then while he watches the girl dries the clothes on the line and smiles coyly, – cute, isn’t it!

Not just that, the stats also suggest that 76% Indian men believe that doing laundry is a woman’s job and cos men feel that, no wonder that 77% of Indian men depend on the women in their house for laundry. Have you ever seen a man walk into your office without a shirt and say, well, Mommy was not at home or Wifey was sick? Never. That’s how perfectly women do this job at most of the Indian homes. Without fail, every week or sometimes twice a week!

I am a working married woman and I am also a part of that 85% of Indian women who feel that  they have two jobs – both full time, one at work and one at home. It’s hard to say that but yes, I also feel the same. I am not saying this cos of the laundry thing but for other reasons – from what will we eat today, to do we have the groceries at home? From will the maid come to work to what if somebody comes and sees the house is dirty? Sometimes I think women like me are under a lot of stress thinking about setting the house in order. We always don’t need to but we end up doing that – sometimes knowingly and sometimes unknowingly.

I am writing for #IsLaundryOnlyAWomansJob activity at BlogAdda.com in association with Ariel and my story is a little different. At my place, VT is one who tells me that let’s do the laundry. We never divided the chores but somehow, when it comes to laundry, I am the one who just turns the machine on. Then when do we put the clothes for drying and when do we get the clothes back from outside, he is engaging and inspiring. He keeps pulling out every single dress and cos the balcony cannot accommodate him, he passes them on to me to let them dry. The only hard part of laundry that I face is folding them and getting them back in the cupboard. That’s where I have no help but this doesn’t disturb me cos the rest was handled by him.

I think the men of today like VT and many others do realize that women of the household have so much to do. They appreciate the time and effort we put in to get our respective houses be perfect. However, the challenge is that very few men have seen their fathers helping their mothers. We can bring a change by letting little boys know that no chore is specific to women or men. They can do anything they want to support their partner. Those men who are adaptive and ready to change try to break the stereotypes but those who don’t like to change become a part of the 67% of Indian men who prefer to watch TV instead of helping or doing the laundry.

I am lucky to say that I am not among the rest 73% of Indian women whose husbands prefer to relax over helping with household chores. VT and I delegate our household chores to our help at home when possible and when not, this is what happens until either of us takes up the task!

New Year, New Possibilities! Thank you Readers for making 2014 such a great year and encouraging me to blog. Your comments, likes, shares and tweets keep me going. I promise to write better!